I'd like to submit two reviews - one for Tennessee Barber Co and the other for Mr. Patrick Smith's hilarious 2 star review 5 months prior to now.
Review #1: I couldn't say more positive things about this barber shop, but I'll keep it brief...
Read MoreI'd like to submit two reviews - one for Tennessee Barber Co and the other for Mr. Patrick Smith's hilarious 2 star review 5 months prior to now.
Review #1: I couldn't say more positive things about this barber shop, but I'll keep it brief since review #2 isn't. Top notch haircuts? Check. Great conversation about everyday life and culture? Double check. Solid, down to Earth dudes? Triple check. I've been coming here since they opened their doors at the old location. Kyle has never given me a single "poor" haircut. Do yourself a favor and start coming here immediately.
Review #2: Some reviews are informative, some are insightful, and then there are reviews like Patrick Smith's—an accidental comedic gem that critiques Tennessee Barber Co. less like a barber shop and more like a therapy session gone awry.
First, let’s address the elephant in the barber chair: Kyle, the quiet artisan, is painted as some sort of cold, unapproachable hair sorcerer. The reviewer gushes about the “exceptional” haircut Kyle delivered twice—to the point where friends and family were in awe—but instead of applause, Kyle gets slammed for not moonlighting as a stand-up comic or life coach. It’s a barber shop, not a TED Talk, dude.
The review spirals into hilarity with the accusation that he just failed the unspoken “SoCal vibe check.” I'm not even sure what that means. Are you saying that Kyle expects you to toss on a pair of sunglasses, say “dude” after every sentence, and get offered kombucha mid-cut?
The critique of Kyle’s Memorial Day response is where this reviewer truly shines. The reviewer asked him about his holiday, and Kyle, in what we can only assume was an act of self-preservation, delivered a succinct answer. Maybe Kyle wasn’t feeling chatty, or maybe—brace yourself—he was concentrating on cutting your hair to perfection. Either way, the reviewer’s exasperation reads like a rom-com breakup scene: “I wanted conversation, Kyle, but all I got was… good hair.”
Then there’s the pièce de résistance: the cost-per-minute calculation. Who even thinks to measure barber shop value in terms of dollars per minute? It’s a haircut, not a pay-per-view boxing match. And yet, the reviewer, mid-pullover on the way home (hilarious btw that you stopped your vehicle because you were so distraught), decided to immortalize their disappointment in the form of a Google manifesto. One imagines the dramatic sigh as he typed furiously, swearing to never darken Kyle’s barber chair again.
Ultimately, this review isn’t so much a critique of Tennessee Barber Co. as it is a misadventure in unmet personal expectations. Kyle doesn’t need to be chatty to give you an incredible haircut; he’s not auditioning for a daytime talk show. But with that said, Kyle talks to everyone else so maybe you are just special.
Wheelchair accessible elevator 
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